It is not enough that war, economic distress, natural disasters, Zombie Apocalypse and threaten us on every side but now true disaster threatens. Yes my dear readers Hostess has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy. While the company has announced that “normal operations” will continue the threat is real. The world could possibly find that the leading manufacturer of food designed to survive the Apocalypse may go out of business, or even worse be bought and parted out Twinkie by Twinkie by Bain Capital.
I grew up with Twinkies, they were one of the 5 major food groups of grade school for the sack lunch crowd. I know that my lunch box always had Twinkies in it, or if not Twinkies another Hostess delicacy such as Chocolate cupcakes with creme filling, or a fruit pie. My peanut butter and jelly sandwich was made with the softest and freshest Wonder Bread.
While my tastes have adjusted over the years there are times that my mind will wander back to the innocence of childhood and the blissful unawareness of just how bad this was for me. But back then when we had to walk 8 miles through the mud and rain to go to school without so much as a Walkman and had to actually go outside to play without a smart phone we could burn off all the calories and were energized by the rush created by the combination of pure unadulterated sugar and God knows what else so that we wouldn’t fall asleep in class after lunch. Yes my friends those were the days.
But the world is passing Hostess and the Twinkie by and that could threaten civilization as we know it. I mean what will we lose next? I tremble at the thought. Will it be the Zinger? or possibly the Baby Ruth bar?
With North Korea, Pakistan already having nukes and Iran threatening to build them it is imperative that we invest in America and emergency preparedness. The Congress should approve emergency legislation to preserve the Twinkie and stock the Strategic Twinkie Reserve before it is too late. I don’t know about you but cheap knock offs made by Little Debbie are no substitute for the Twinkie although a Krispy Kreme Chocolate Pie will give the Hostess pie a run for its money…but I digress. Twinkie production must supported by the Defense Department and Department of Homeland Security. Every MRE should contain a Twinkie and Twinkies should be part of FEMA emergency food stocks to support Hostess like we did in the 1970s when the Federal Government bought almost everything that Chrysler Corporation produced to save the company.
Write your Congressman and tell them to save the Twinkie before it is too late. The future of the country could depend on it.
Peace
Padre Steve+
The Inglorius Padre Steve's World 
Twinkies are far more important than a necessary part of an MRE. Had we bombarded Bagdad with Twinkies in 2003, we could have greatly cut down on casualties. A year’s diet of nothing but Twinkies, and 3 Boy Scouts could’ve taken on the Iraqi Army! 😉
Besides, think of it this way. If GM or Chrysler were to have gone out of business, we would still have plenty of car brands from which to purchase a vehicle. But without Twinkies, ALL car companies would suffer, as the large SUVs required to house a Twinkie-engorged US backside are the highest profit-margin vehicles. No Twinkies could end not only all US car companies, but even such giants as Mercedes and VW, not to mention the SUV-heavy KIA and Hyundai lines.
Twinkies for capitalism! Twinkies for the ideals of freedom and the pursuit of happiness! Twinkies for America! (Insert patriotic music here.)
Rats, now I’m hungry. Where are those darn Twinkies……. 😀