Daily Archives: September 5, 2012

Un-American Activities and Such…

Note: I always recommend that anyone who writes anything look at it before they go final. I took Molly for a walk after I wrote and i realized that this post is pretty much a throw away that decided to keep.  I meant to write something serious tonight but got sidetracked on the way to doing it. This is the result. 

I am engaged in un-American subversive behavior tonight. That’s right, I am not being a patriotic American. I am neither watching the NFL opener between the New York Non-Baseball Giants and the Dallas Cowboys nor the Democratic National Convention. No I was watching South Park. I won’t be watching most of the DNC for the same reasons that I didn’t watch the RNC last week, unless I decide to tune in to watch former President Bill Clinton.  However, even in non-election years I have a hard time watching football, while I observe the high holy days of the MLB pennant race. If that makes me un-American I will wear the label with pride but this does not make me a Commie.

Now I didn’t plan this, I simply forgot to switch the channel from John Stewart to the MLB channel and got sucked into a really funny South Park episode. It is the one where the South Park boys meet Jared Fogel of Subway Sandwich fame and that Stan makes the astute observation that “Yeah, it’s only in America that somebody can become famous just because they go from being a big fatass to not being a big fatass.”

Now as soon as the episode was over I switched to watch baseball on the MLB channel. Maybe later I will turn the channel to watch Bill Clinton speak at the DNC. People love my Clinton impersonation, and some find it scary.  During the 2000 election fiasco I tormented my battalion’s intelligence officer by doing my Clinton impersonation while we were deployed in Okinawa. Besides I could use some new Clinton material.

While I was stuck in traffic leaving work today I was doing my own Clinton DNC speech writing, except it was in my head because I had nothing to write with. I realized then that I need to become more sophisticated and learn to do You Tube comedy videos. However if I do the video thing I will have to get a Clinton wig since my bald scalp won’t do the trick.

That being said what Stan of South Park said is dead on right. Whether it is someone becoming famous because they were once a fatass and now are not a fatass, or because they are some other kind of uncouth reality TV slob with no redeeming qualities whatsoever there is no place like the good old USA. The South Park kids may be among the most foul on television but their satire of American culture is often more spot on than the perfidious political pundits, politicians and preachers that prostitute themselves for the big bucks by pontificating on Fox News, CNN, MSNBC and countless “news” organizations. But I digress…

Back to the baseball games and my other un-American activities. But before I go I have to say that I am not a Commie and if your mommy is a Commie you’ve got a Commie mommy and you better turn your Commie mommy in.

That my friends is how one can take a throw away post and turn it into patriotic jibber-jabber. Don’t forget it. God bless America.

Peace

Padre Steve+

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Filed under Baseball, football, Just for fun, Political Commentary