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About padresteve

I'm a Navy Chaplain and Old Catholic Priest
May 8, 2009 · 21:58

PRT’s PFA’s PFT’s APFT’s APRT’s and Whatever Else We Can Call a PT Test

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Today was my time to take my Physical Readiness Test for the Navy.  I actually think that we call it a PFA or Physical Fitness Assessment, but nonetheless it is what in the old days we simply called a “PT Test.”  I have to say that I think that I did okay, despite a conscious decision not to push myself too hard and “strive for mediocrity” for the first time in my Navy career.  You will of course see that I had good reasons for this and that I wasn’t slacking too bad all things considered.

Now I have been doing PT tests  in one way shape or form for almost 28 years.   I started them back when I enlisted in the National Guard and concurrently began Army ROTC at UCLA back in 1981.  Back then the PT test was known as the Army Physical Fitness Test, or APFT.  It consisted then of push ups, sit ups and a 2 mile run and remained that way through my entire Army career.  As a young guy  I was good at the 2 mile run and killed the sit ups. Unfortunately the Army did and still does sit ups the worst way imaginable for your lower back.  You go all the way up and down and keep your hands behind your neck.   In the Army I usually did pretty good on the PT test but initially struggled with push ups.  I had not yet learned the importance of good form and was always psych’d out by them. Thus my scores for the push ups while satisfactory always dragged my overall score down. I finally started getting where I could just about reach the maximum for my age when the Army renamed the test and increased the numbers required to get the maximum score.  The new name was the Army Physical Readiness Test or APRT and the push up numbers went way up from 67 to I think it was 88 for the maximum score.  That sucked, I finally got where I could achieve the maximum and they raised the bar.  So for the rest of my Army career I pretty much resigned myself to the lower score despite doing what was previously the maximum number of push ups.

Then after 17 1/2 years in the Army I went over to the Navy.  I had to do the PRT, or the Physical Readiness Test.  The Navy test is similar to the Army but different.  I don’t know what the Army does now, except that they still do the push ups, sit ups and 2 mile run.  The Navy does push ups, curl ups and a mile and a half run.  The Navy numbers even at my age of 49 to get a “Outstanding” score are more than anything I had to do at a younger age in the Army.  The one and a half mile run is harder for me than the 2 mile run.  I am a distance runner.  When I am healthy, which I really have  not been since Iraq I run 5-8 miles.  Now I’m doing 3-4, not bad, but not what I want.  Just a few years ago I was doing half-marathons.  So a mile and a half to me is a sprint.  To get the maximum score I need to light the afterburners.  However after a lot of years of doing these things I have learned all about form and the nuances of how to do well, even the run, which when I am not injured a I can do in 10:00 to 10:00.  Not bad for an old guy.  When I was  at  EOD Group Two before I went to Iraq my RP2, Nelson Lebron and I smoked the test.  Afterward one of the EOD techs kiddingly asked Nelson “Dude, what kind of ‘roids is the chaplain on?”  The fact is that I love doing well and beating the young guys.  It has become a personal challenge.  Part of this is because I’m not young, and the other is I remember so many Army Chaplains who were physical wrecks who looked bad in uniform and had really poor physical conditioning.  Now there were fit chaplains but there were enough of the others to make the Corps look bad.  As a professional officer as well as a priest, I am 100% officer and 100% priest.  Kind of  a hypostatic union kind of thing going on here.

Now in addition to the Navy I have served two Fleet Marine Force tours and have my Fleet Marine Force Officer Qualification pin.  Part of the joy of serving with the Marines as a Navy Officer is getting to do their physical fitness test as an option to the Navy.  The Marines use pull ups instead of push ups, curl ups and a 3 mile run.  The run is actually my favorite of the three services.  My first mile is my warm up.  I hit my stride in the second and smoke the third.  I had to work hard at the pull ups but got where I could do enough to pass the Marine PFT with a “Class One” score.  The Marines have three levels of passing, Class one, two and three.  The Marines have recently added a Combat Fitness Test with all sorts of really tough stuff that guys might have to do in combat.  It does not look fun.

DMZ PTPT on the Korean DMZ March 2001

The penalty for failing the PT test in the Army, Marines or Navy is tough.  It can stop promotion or even get one kicked out of the service.  Height and weight standards too are important.  You don’t want to be flagged as overweight.  If you fail the PT test or bust the weight or body fat you get to go on some form of remedial PT which is usually in addition to everything else that you have to do.  I am genetically undertall and I really have to watch this.

Today I had my Spring PRT or was we call them now the PFA.  The events haven’t changed but the name has been changed to protect the innocent.  As I said I have had a lot of nagging injuries returning from Iraq, coupled with my PTSD and insomnia made the past year or so pretty hard.  I came back from Iraq and continued to push myself and while getting my usual “Outstanding” score made my injuries worse.  Shoulder problems kept me from the push ups for the first time in my career.  I had mildly sprained my left ankle running last week.  So I decided today that I would simply shoot for an “Excellent” score.  The Deity Herself was with me this morning despite being dinged up. After I drank my 24 once cup of Southern Pecan coffee with a healthy dose of Splenda and French Vanilla creamer from “The Dancing Goat”  and an el cheapo chocolate donut I did 75 push ups in about a minute and a half and stopped, I knew I had 10 or 15 more in me but decided to strive for mediocrity.  The run I decided to set an 8 minute mile pace and not get too excited completing the run in 11:56.  This is the worst time I have ever did the run in since I joined the Navy.  However I finished 3rd of the 25 or so sailors doing the run.   In the fall I hope to be fully spun up and really ready to embarrass the young guys.  Until then I will celebrate tomorrow when I come off of duty with donuts, hot and fresh Krispy Kreme donuts with coffee.  Back to the ICU.

Peace and blessings, Steve+

Note: I have absolutely no idea what the Air Force does.  I think though that their PT test includes a round of golf, and time at the 19th hole.

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May 7, 2009 · 15:38

Baseball in Between Life and Death in the ICU

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I have had a number of patients in my ICUs who are or in the case of some who have passed away avid baseball fans.  Likewise there are a number of physicians and nurses who are avid fans of the game, or sometimes certain teams.  Like me the are members of the Church of Baseball.  Some even attend my parish, Harbor Park.  It is funny how in the intersection of life and death that baseball finds a place more than any other sport.  Baseball has a quality and nuance that is different from most other sports, save perhaps golf.  Baseball is not bound by the constraints of time.  It has an eternal quality that somehow transcends life and death. Two of my favorite attending physicians are big fans and one coaches on the side.

There is a scene in The Babe Ruth Story where a critically ill child asks the Babe to hit a home run for him.  The Babe then went out and hit two.  Later in the movie when the Babe is dying of cancer he is given a Miraculous Medal.  The film was rushed to completion before Ruth died and the scene at Yankee Stadium was filmed shortly before a game and Ruth came from his death bed to be there.

In Field of Dreams the spirits of the 1919 White Sox who were forced out of baseball in the “Blacksox” scandal.  The Pride of the Yankees deals with the life of Lou Gehrig, baseball’s original “Iron Man” and his battle with ALS.  His speech at Yankee Stadium when he retired from the game is classic.  It is a reflection on life well lived and thanksgiving for what he experienced.

LouGehrigDay

Lou Gehrig at Lou Gehrig Day July 4th 1939

“Fans, for the past two weeks you have been reading about a bad break I got. Yet today, I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth. I have been in ballparks for seventeen years and I have never received anything but kindness and encouragement from you fans. Look at these grand men. Which of you wouldn’t consider it the highlight of his career just to associate with them for even one day? Sure I’m lucky. Who wouldn’t have considered it an honor to have known Jacob Ruppert? Also, the builder of baseball’s greatest empire, Ed Barrows? To have spent six years with that wonderful little fellow, Miller Huggins? Then to have spent the next nine years with that outstanding leader, that smart student of psychology, the best manager in baseball today, Joe McCarthy? Sure, I’m lucky. When the New York Giants, a team you would give your right arm to beat and vice versa, sends you a gift, that’s something. When everybody down to the groundskeeper and those boys in white coats remember you with trophies, that’s something. When you have a father and mother work all their lives so that you can have an education and build your body, it’s a blessing. When you have a wife who has been a tower of strength and shown more courage than you dreamed existed, that’s the finest I know. I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the Earth. And I might have been given a bad break, but I’ve got an awful lot to live for.” – July 4, 1939 at Yankee Stadium on Lou Gehrig Appreciation Day

These are intersections of life and death.  In the ICUs I have a surprising amount of dealings with baseball.  I have a lady who is very sick.  She is a delightful woman with a wonderful husband. She looked like she was on the uptick a couple of days ago we had a great talk, and wonderful time.  We found that we shared a common passion…you guessed it, baseball. We agreed that the Biblical writers describing heaven being unaware of the Deity’s love of baseball had erred in their description of heaven. We agreed that heaven had to have not streets of gold, but the lushest turf and most immaculate infield, with foul lines that went into infinity.   She and her husband watched the Nationals and Astros play deep into the night.  Yesterday she took a turn for the worse.  As we visited we visited I prayed and anointed her at her request.  And I asked her if she would like a baseball. Her eyes lit up and she nodded “yes.”  So I promised that I would get one from the stadium last night.  Well, the Devil got in the mix and the Tides got rained out, so I went home.  I found a ball that I got when throwing out the first pitch at a Kinston Indians game a few years back.  I inscribed it to her and took it to her room. She was pretty heavily sedated, but her sister was with her.  I let her know that I had the baseball for her.  She opened her eyes and I put the ball in her hand.  Her hand gripped it tight and I blessed her.

I do pray that she will get better.

Peace, Steve+

grainger stadiumGranger Stadium Kinston NC

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May 6, 2009 · 18:07

Dien Bien Phu- Reflections 55 Years Later

VIETNAM DIEN BIEN PHU

French POWs from Dien Bien Phu being marched into captivity

On May 8th 1954 the French garrison of Dien Bien Phu surrendered to the Viet Minh.  It was the end of the ill-fated Operation Castor in which the French had planned to lure the Viet Minh Regulars into open battle and use superior firepower to decimate them.  The strategy which had been used on a smaller scale the previous year at Na Son.

The French had thought they had come up with a template based on Na Son in how to engage and destroy the Viet Minh.  The plan was called the “Air-land base.”  It involved having strong forces in a defensible position deep behind enemy lines supplied by air.  At Na Son the plan worked as the French were on high ground, had superior artillery and were blessed by General Giap using human wave assaults which made the Viet Minh troops fodder for the French defenders.  Even still Na Son was a near run thing for the French and had almost no effect on Viet Minh operations elsewhere while tying down a light division equivalent and a large portion of French air power.

The French took away the wrong lesson from Na-Son and repeated it at Dien Bien Phu.  The French desired to use Dien Bien Phu as a base of operations against the Viet Minh.  Unfortunately the French chose badly. The elected to occupy a marshy valley surrounded by hills covered in dense jungle.  They elected to go light on artillery and the air head was at the far end of the range of French aircraft, especially tactical air forces which were in short supply.  Likewise French logistics needs were greater than the French Air Force and American contractors could supply.  French positions were exposed and not mutually supporting.  The terrain was so poor that French units were incapable of any meaningful offensive operations against the Viet Minh.  As such they could only dig in and wait for battle.  Even so many positions were not adequately fortified and the artillery was exposed. The French garrison was a good force.  It was comprised of Airborne units, Foriegn Legion, Colonials (Marines), North Africans and Vietnamese troops.  Many of the officers including LtCol Langlais and Major Bigeard commander of the 6th Colonial Parachute Battalion were among the best leaders in the French Army. Others who served in Indo-China including David Galula and Jaques Trinquier would write books which would help Americans in Iraq.  Unfortunately the French High Command badly underestimated the capabilities and wherewithal of the Giap and his divisions.

Giap rapidly concentrated his forces and built excellent logistics support.  He placed his artillery in well concealed and fortified positions which could use direct fire on French positions. Giap also had more and heavier artillery than the French believed him to have.  Additionally he brought in a large number of anti-aircraft batteries whose positions enabled the Viet Minh to take a heavy toll among French Aircraft.  Giap also did not throw his men away in human assaults.  Instead he used his Sappers (combat engineers) to build protective trenches leading up to the very wire of French defensive positions.  In time these trenches came to resemble a spider web.

Without belaboring this post the French fought hard as did the Viet Minh.  Many French positions were overwhelmed by accurate artillery and well planned attacks.  The French hoped for U.S. air intervention, even the possibility of using nuclear weapons against the Viet Minh.  The were turned down.  Relief forces were unable to get through.  The garrison died, despite the bravery of the Paratroops and Legionaries.  The French garrison was let down by their high command and their government and lost the battle due to inadequate logistics and air power.  The survivors endured a forced march of nearly 400 miles by foot to POW camps in which many died.  Many were subjected to torture and group discipline.  Few French caved to the Viet Minh interrogations but some would come away with the belief that one had to use such means to fight the revolutionaries.  French and their Algerian comrades would apply this lessons against each other within a year of their release.  French soldiers and officers were shipped from Indo-China to Algeria to wage another protracted counterinsurgency.  Militarily they had all but won that war when their government pulled out. French troops, especially the Legionaries and Paratroops felt betrayed by their nation, much like many Vietnam Vets felt about the United States government after that war.  I find today that both our government and people are caring for our returning troops in a far better manner than the past.  Even still the veterans of Iraq and Afghanistan share almost a spiritual link to our American and French brothers in arms who fought at Dien Bien Phu, the Street Without Joy and places like Khe Sanh, Hue City, the Ia Drang and the Mekong.

bigeard_instruction_sautLtCol Bigeard at Dien Bien Phu

The lessons of the French at Dien Bien Phu and in Indo-China were not learned by the United States as it entered Vietnam.  In fact the US Army made a conscious effort to ignore the advice of those that they called  “losers.”  It was an arrogance for which we paid dearly, Despite the efforts of General David Petreus and others these lessons have not been completely learned by western military organizations.  Old habits die hard, counterinsurgency done right isn’t sexy.  Despite a lot of institutional resistance from traditionally minded officers we have, thanks to General Petreus had a good amount of success in Iraq. I believe that Iraq will do okay in the long run.  Someday I hope to take up the invitation of Iraqi friends to go back. I am concerned about Afghanistan. It  has the potential to be Vietnam in the mountains.  I do hope and pray that we will figure Afghanistan out.  Will there be a situation where an isolated NATO garrison is overrun?  One would hope not, but we cannot underestimated the Afghans and their ability to adapt to NATO tactics and weapons. A year or so ago the Taliban came close to overrunning an American Coalition Outpost (COP).   Dien Bien Phu is a warning from history not to leave troops in places where their exposure leaves them vulnerable.

Last night at the ball game, Ray and Bill, the Vietnam vets who man the beer stand on the concourse behind home plate gave me a small memento.  A small wooden coming from the Virginia Chapter of the Vietnam Veterans of America.  On the back side a simple message: “Welcome Home.”  Something that they did not get when they came home.  My dad came home in 1974 after back to back 11 month deployments, one of which he was at An Loc, besieged for 80 days.  He never talked about it.  I go home next week.  My dad is slowly dying and doesn’t have that much longer left, his physician cannot believe that he is still alive.  I have to help my mom with funeral arrangements, some hospice stuff, billing issues with the insurance company and the nursing home.  My dad had expressed his desire to be buried at sea in the Gulf of Tonkin.  He told my brother he wanted this because it had the most beautiful sunsets he had ever seen.  I do hope that we can fulfill that wish.  As a Navy Chaplain I know I can work out the burial at sea, and pray that somehow I will be able to take him where he wants to go.

Thank you dad.  Thank you Ray and Bill and all my Vietnam era friends and mentors, from the California Guard, SSG Buff Rambo, SSG Mickey Yarro and Colonel Edgar Morrison.  Thanks also to SFC Harry Zilkan, SFC Harry Ball, 1st Sergeant Jim Koenig, Colonel Donald Johnson and Sergeant Major John Butler.  I especially thank my former parishioners at the Fort Indiantown Gap Chapel.  Charlie, Ray, General Smoker, Scotty and the rest of you.  Thanks also to my Battle of Hue City brothers, Barney, Limey, General Pace, Sergeant Major Thomas.  Thank you also to the French officers who did so much for their country and were treated so shamefully.  A number of these men have passed on but I will not forget them.  Others I have lost contact with. Please take the time to thank the Vietnam, Iraq and Afghanistan veterans in your lives.  May no other veterans have to endure what all of you endured at the hands of your countrymen. May God bless all of you.

Peace, Steve+

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May 5, 2009 · 16:41

Rainy Days on Mondays and Tuesdays Always Get Me Down…Especially on Game Night

Last night was a disappointment.  We had our second rain out of the year at Harbor Park.  I got to the the stadium just prior to what should have been the first pitch.  We were already delayed, but the radio announcer on 1310 AM sports radio say that he thought that they might get the game in.  Boy was he wrong.   I got to the park and had my usual chat with Chip the usher for section 202, my friend and usher Elliott visiting family and slacking in Massachusetts this week.  I also talked with Ray and Bill the Vietnam Veteran  Beer vendors and Kenny over at the King Twist Pretzel stand.  As I was getting my cup of Gordon Biersch Marzen the rain started coming down again.  Like really heavy.  I went over and got my pretzel, this time salted with Guilden’s Spicy Brown Mustard and continued to visit on the concourse.  I did not even dare to try to take my seat in section 102 row B.  Far too exposed to the elements. The rain continued as me and my stadium buddies talked about life, baseball the military and other assorted subjects.

I’ve never been a big fan of rain, especially when I have to be out in it.  I have never been fond of the tropics for this very reason.  I always figured with my love for the military that had I served in World War II that I would have done very well with Rommel and the Afrika Korps, but not so well at Guadalcanal.  To my Vietnam era brothers, I’ll take the desert of my Iraq any day over the Mekong Delta.  When I deployed with the Marines to Okinawa in 2000-2001 I was ever so glad to go to Camp Fuji Japan and to South Korea for this very reason.  I don’t like to be out in the rain.  I know that we need it, but I still don’t like it.  I hate to clean mud off of me or dry out clothing and not only that there are the vermin.  Snakes, bugs and all sorts of slithery and slimy creatures that you can’t see loaded with all sorts of poisons and disease.  There are patently some of those things in the desert, but they are easier to spot.

We in addition to contenting with the infernal rain, we had a leak at the hospital which involved my office.  It was damaged by the leak, not nearly as badly as my next door neighbor Carl, but enough to warrant me getting called at home and to have to wait for maintenance people half of the morning.  That is now fixed and as I look at the fresh ceiling tile, untouched by moisture I breathe a sigh of relief.  I look in my trash can and see the goo of the former ceiling tiles which look like regurgitated oatmeal with mold on it, and I can only thank God for Grace.  Not God’s Grace, which I am always thankful to the Deity Herself for, but for Grace the lady who faithfully cleans my office who found the leak and reported it.  God does look after Her miscreant baseball loving Priests, and once again I am thankful.

It has been raining all day today.  I do feel that this is the Devils work for only the Devil could be involved in trying to rain out more one game in a short homestead.  I will head over to Harbor Park and hopefully this infernal rain will relent and we will be graced by baseball tonight. If not, I’ll have my beer and hot dog and go home when they call it after conversation with my friends on the concourse.

Blessings, Steve+

Post Script:  The Deity Herself smiled upon us.  The rain ended and we got game one in before it started coming down again.  The Tides won on a combined 2 hit shutout by starter Rich Hill and Matt Albers.  Hill was in his 3rd rehab start with the Tides.  Tarps we being readied as I left the stadium between the two games.   The weather radar shows some pretty heavy weather coming up from the southwest.  I do think that the Devil may take the nightcap away.   I had a nice time talking with Chip, Ray, Bill and Kenny up on the concourse.  Had an older gentleman who said that he played for the 1969 Tides sat next to me with his brother who knew little about the game.  The older gentleman knew the game and when his less than knowledgeable brother got distracted on the concourse for a couple of innings we had a nice talk.  All in all a nice night.  Hopefully tomorrow is even better. Peace, Steve+

Second Post Script: Despite the Devil’s best efforts the Deity Herself ensured that the weather held at Harbor Park for the Tides to take the nightcap from the Clippers 5-2.  This in spite of a 17 minute power outage.  The weather is now coming in fast.  David Hernadez got the win for theTides and Jim Miller the save. Nolan Reimold, Scott Moore and Oscar Salazer all doubled and Mike Costanzo tripled.

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May 4, 2009 · 15:14

Hollywood and Recruiting Since Vietnam

I have been thinking about how Hollywood occasionally helps military recruiting in the post-Vietnam and all-volunteer era.

Back in World War II Hollywood Moguls signed on to further the war effort with films which were entertaining but also inspiring to those on the home front.  Films like Wake Island, they Were Expendable, Destination Tokyo, The Fighting Sullivans, the Flying Tigers, The Memphis Belle (1943), and Thirty Seconds over Tokyo all helped bolster the war effort.  Stars like Jimmy Stewart served in combat.  These were the high tide of patriotic war films.  In the post war era more films about the war were made until Vietnam made war films a riskier proposition for studios.  With the exception of The Green Berets and a few Second World War themed films such as The Longest Day, In Harms Way, The Battle of the Bulge and Patton war films became much more anti-war and often anti-military.  Such films as Catch 22, M*A*S*H, Go Tell the Spartans, Kelly’s Heroes showed this while films like Platoon, The Deer Hunter and Coming Home showed the dark side of Vietnam.

In the 1970s some films like Midway began the return of film makers to more positive looks at the military. After the election of Ronald Reagan Hollywood began to produce more military themed films.  Some were fully endoresed by the Department of Defense and others not.  Some were designed to make the miltary look good and well, some which were not intended to do so had the opposite effect.

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The most successful of these films dealt with the Navy and Marine Corps, those dealing with the Army and Air Force were not as successful, though the Iron Eagle series with Louis Gossett Jr. had a pretty good run.  Films like Top Gun thrilled young audiences with both the story of Naval Aviators, a great musical score and some really hot and sensual scenes.  The Hunt for Red October was another thriller in which Tom Clancy made the Navy look great.  An Officer and a Gentleman had some of the most memorable Drill Sergeant scenes of any film, with Louis Gossett Jr. in the role of Gunnery Sergeant Foley destroying and rebuilding a class of OCS candidates led by Richard Gere.

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Once again a good story well acted and some great love scenes and musical score made this appeal to the younger generation.  I was across the Puget Sound when this was being filmed having my own ass ripped by an Army Special Forces, Ranger and Vietnam veteran Drill Sergeant.  I could relate to Richard Gere crying “I’m not going to DOR, I’ve got nowhere else to go.” Thank you Sergeant First Class Harry Ball for making me a better person by destroying all preconceptions that I had about myself and rebuilding me.  Judy when she first saw the movie asked if I had a Puget Sound Deb but alas, I did not.  I was too busy cleaning latrines with a toothbrush for any extra-curricular activities even if I was so inclined. Clint Eastwood’s Heartbreak Ridge was a positive portrayal of a Marine taking over a Recon Platoon before going into Grenada.

jessup

A Few Good Men was not supposed to be a film that made the Marines look good.  Director Rob Reiner attempted to get permission of the Marines to film at Guantanamo Bay but was unable to do so because of the script.  The film turned out to be a cult classic among many Marines.  Jack Nicholson’s portrayal of Colonel Nathan Jessup became a hit.  The line You ant the Truth, you can’t handle the truth!” followed by the rest of the speech is classic.  The character that Nicholson was based on was a real CO of Gitmo.  He was relieved after about a year into his two year tour.  A former CO of mine who served under that man at another duty station said that officers and enlisted alike lived in fear of him. More recent films such as Saving Private Ryan and the Band of Brothers HBO mini-series brought positive attention to the men of the greatest generation.  Films about Iraq have varied.  Perhaps the best is Taking Chance with Kevin Bacon playing a Marine LtCol. escorting the body of a young Marine killed in action home.

So it is interesting to see how Hollywood sometimes helps and sometimes hurts recruiting.  We’ll have to see what the next batch of war films turn out to be like.

Peace, Steve+

private-ryan-beach

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May 3, 2009 · 20:08

Memorable Recruiting Slogans and the All Volunteer Force

“Pick a service, pick a challenge, set yourself apart, Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines! What a great place it’s a great place to start!” Late 1970’s and early 1980’s military recruiting jingle.

stripes-poster

I was in high school when Selective Service was ended and the military switched from a force that was primarily draftees to the “All Volunteer” military.  At first this was not a good thing, not the fault of the change but because of the timing.  The United States had withdrawn from Vietnam, morale was low and the country in the midst of a massive political crisis.  The military had become a target for any protester with an axe to grind against the government.  The  military was seen by many as a place for losers.  And unfortunately a lot of the early volunteers, while not necessarily losers, were among the lowest classes of recruits.  By the 1980s this began to get better and the all volunteer force became one of the finest military organizations in the world, in some areas the finest.

In the process of this the military has spent lots and lots of dollars to attract the best recruits.  In order to do this effectively it turned to Madison avenue advertising gurus.  These are the same people who can make you want to choke down an otherwise unpalatable sandwich and fries  from a fast food chain that causes your arteries to harden before you finish.  Yes the very same guys who make cigarettes which turn your lungs into tarry goop look sexy, and who can turn the slimiest of politicians into someone who makes you feel good because “they care.”  Obviously these were dark times for the military…it could not have been easy for the brass who cut their teeth at Normandy, Iwo Jima, Midway, Korea and Vietnam that they should rely on Madison Avenue to get them the best recruits available.

In the process we got some good and not so good recruiting slogans.  One of the early Army ditties was “We do more by 9 in the morning than most people do in an entire day.”  Having spent 17 1/2 years in the Army I can say that this was true at least as far as how many hours you were awake before the rest of the world woke up.  What they forgot to mention was that “We spend more time after hours daily than most people do in an entire month.”  This was even more true.  I remember one incident where some Headquarters weenie at V Corps in Frankfurt saw a vehicle at Frankfurt Airport with a tail light out.  The edict went out from high to find the offending vehicle.  Of course instead of simply looking up the bumper number or vehicle type, they queried the whole Corps.  About 1900, or 7PM to civilian types my Motor Sergeant Steve Culp and I were about to close up shop on this Friday evening.   Our Company Commander sent us back out in the dark and the snow and sleet to check taillights.  No offending taillights found we reported to the C.O. who told us to wait until Corps told us that we could go home.  Finally after the report went up through Group, the 3rd Support Command and Corps word came back, about 2200 that we were safe.  We could go home.  It was like an Army version of the Strawberry incident in the Caine Mutiny only without the ice cream.

if_not_you

Of course the Army not to outdo itself created a monster in it’s “Army of One” campaign  The “There’s Strong and then there’s Army Strong” campaign is better but I did see a hilarious screen saver at the Navy mobilization site at Ft Jackson SC.   That parody had the caption “There’s Stupid and then there’s  Army Stupid.”

The classic Army recruiting ditty was “Be all that you can be!” This lasted a long time.  Of course it engendered both positive and negative reactions but one definitely associated it with personal success and the Army.  Admittedly for some people it didn’t take much to get to being all that they could be, but still it was a pretty good slogan. Another Army slogan was “Get an edge on life.” I thought it forgettable as obviously did most who heard it.

The Air Force had one that also became legendary.  “Aim High.” It pointed people up.  Since very few people in the Air Force ever set foot in a military aircraft this slogan engendered a sense that if you were in the Air Force that you would be flying.  This was cool and since the Air Force also sold itself as being “A great way of life” it ensured that people would get people who liked the sexiness of being associated with aircraft and great base services. These I think were better than the current crop which include some lame slogans like “Do something amazing.” and “We’ve been waiting for you.” On the plus side the Air Force Song actually talks about shooting people, albeit from far away, but still give them credit.

aim-high

The Navy has had a number of recruiting slogans over the years.  I think the classic was “The Navy, it’s not just a job, it’s an adventure.” The current slogan, “Accelerate your life.” is just okay.  Saturday Night Live did a spoof on the “not just a job” back in the late 1970s.  After showing a old supply ship at Bayonne NJ with sailors chipping paint, scrubbing heads (toilets) and every other menial task associated with the Navy the clip ended: “It’s not just a job; it’s $96.78 a week.”  That link is here:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL-OtsN9VdM

At the same time the Navy also appealed to it’s heritage linking the past and present.  I think one of the best recruiting posters every made was the “Heritage” poster from the 1970s.

constitution-poster-lg

The Marines though have had the best slogans. “The Few, The Proud, The Marines,” and “The Marines: We’re Looking for a Few Good Men.” and the classic “We didn’t promise you a rose garden.”

rosegarden25vn

The scary part of all of this is that I have been in the military long enough to see all of these commercials  and posters.  Since I look forward to being around at least a few more years I do, with trepidation and an eye for parody look forward to the new slogans that will be introduced and what parodies will be made.

Peace, Steve+

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May 2, 2009 · 21:45

Random Musings-Dos De Mayo, Flu Precautions gone wild Baseball and the Burbs

Today we had a little get together with some friends to celebrate Dos De Mayo.  It was a nice gathering, plenty of great food, good beer and nice conversation.  After folks had left our friends Diane and Tim made a late appearance after the evening Mass.  It was good to spend a couple of hours with them as well.

We were informed that to take no chances regarding the Swine Flu that the Diocese of Richmond has imposed a number of rules regarding the liturgy.  During the Peace there will be no shaking hands, hugging, kissing, snuggling or heavy petting.  Instead parishioners will make a slight bow to each other kind of like those in a Japanese War Movie.  This is not all, during the Lord’s Prayer there will be no hand holding.  While I am a proponent of taking the potential threat of H1N1 seriously, see my previous posts in which I castigate people who don’t,  I don’t think that these steps would stop the spread of H1N1 in any parish.  First there is the whole airborne nature of the virus: “cough cough hack” and all those germs go floating through the church looking for a nice set of young wet lungs to take up residence.  But to totally defeat anything else that they are doing the diocese is still serving communion under two species.  For Protestants that is the bread and the wine, common cup style.  Thus there is a “cough cough and hack” and into the cup goes a nice H1N1 “loogie,” a really sweet addition to the Communion Rite.

Now I don’t propose going to ludicrous speed just yet, the threat while real still needs evaluation.  The problem is when people go to ludicrous speed like the Richmond Diocese they look stupid if the virus is not as bad as first thought. People tend to get angry at those who inconvenienced them and then get careless regarding future threats.  It’s like calling wolf.  If the wolf isn’t there then people start to ignore future warnings.  That is when the trouble begins.  People over react to a threat and if it is not as bad then they get ignored the next time when they are actually right about the threat.   I see this attitude already showing up and the full extent of this outbreak is not even known.  No as I told a person at work, I don’t want any outbreak right now.  I want this to go away.  My reason is really not that noble.  I’m sorry, it’s baseball season and for the first time in my life I have a season ticket.  I’ll be darned if I want an outbreak now.   This thing better be less widespread and potent.

Speaking of baseball the day was not good for my teams.  The Giants and O’s both lost as did the Tides.  The A’s are currently losing in the bottom of the 4th to Seattle.  I guess it could be worse…I could be a Met’s fan. Tomorrow is a new day, but a loss in May counts the same as a loss in September.  The Tides come back in town Monday for a 4 game series with the Columbus Clippers who are now affiliated with the Cleveland Indians. The weather could make things interesting, a pretty good chance of showers each day.

I got my final grade for my last class prior to comprehensive exams in my Masters Degree in Military History at American Military University.  It has been a good course of study.  My concentration was in World War Two, but other required classes got me interested in counter-insurgency.  I did a lot of work dealing with the French in Indo-China and Algeria and the United States in the Philippine War of 1899-1902 and in Vietnam.  That turn prepared me well for my tour in Iraq working with the advisers to the Iraqi 1st and 7th Divisions, 2nd Border Brigade, Police and Highway Patrol in Al Anbar Province.  I completed the class program keeping a 4.0 GPA the entire program.  I have lost track of the amount of papers, posts and readings that I have done in the past three years.  At the same time I feel much more well rounded for the effort.  This is another step to achieving a Masters in History which I had to delay back in 1983.  If things go as I think I will start the comprehensives in June.  My grade posted too late to register for May.  It is probably for the best as I will be traveling out to assist my parents the middle of this month.

I finished the evening by watching the movie The Burbs starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Dern and Carrie Fisher.  It is about a neighborhood gone mad.  I love watching it.  Tonight I caught it while channel surfing on HBO.  Tom Hanks and his friends go to ludicrous speed in trying to figure out if new neighbors led by Henry Gibson are mass murderers.   It is a fun movie and I think that Carrie Fisher looks great in it.

Anyway, have a great night.

Peace, Steve+

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May 1, 2009 · 21:57

Beer and Donuts

Tonight after a hard week for Judy and a reasonably sporty week on the ICU for me, Judy and I went out to dinner at Gordon Biersch.  Patently we are preparing for our Dos De Mayo party and while I have been at work Judy has been working her ass off to cook and clean all week in preparation for this celebration.

Now our  Dos De Mayo is actually a celebration of the fact that we know that the Mexicans will kick the ass of the French on Cinco De Mayo at the battle of Puebla in 1862. The Mexicans were outnumbered 2-1 and whipped up on the French, allowing the Americans who were involved in a brother on brother bloodletting known as the Civil War continue. This enabled Americans to kill each other  to kill each other in peace without the help of any European powers for the next 2 1/2 years. This preserved American sovereignty and kept the evil European Union out of the United States for the next 150 years.  This Independence lasted until a descendant of Robert E. Lee, President Barak Obama, surrendered American sovereignty to Europe in late 2009 and early 2010.  Of course this is mostly BS but it does makes for a great tall tale from someone who has just a bit of Irish blood in him due to the grace of the Deity Herself.

An interesting but little known fact is that Cinqo de Mayo is only locally celebrated in Mexico in the state of Puebla.  The celebration actually began in California where until that time state workers had no state holidays.

The Mexican victory was decidedly helpful to the Union armies who despite a poor opening managed to come back under US Grant and William T. Sherman to decidedly defeat the Confederate armies in the final innings of this brutal game.  Abner Doubleday, who by some accounts invented the game of baseball gets credit for helping to stem the Confederate tide on day one at the Battle of Gettysburg.

Grant got the win and celebrated by donating the liquor for all in the clubhouse after General Robert E. Lee surrendered at Appomattox in April 1865.  This helped bring about the tradition of popping Champagne bottles when a baseball team wins a championship series or the World’s series. Though the South led through the middle of the game, the Union took charge and won the war in in regulation without having to go into extra innings.  This latter comment may be interpreted differently if one assumes that the war was not ended for another 100 years with people like Nathaniel Bedford Forrest and his fellow Klansmen taking over for Lee in extra innings.   Patently though they attempted to keep the game alive, it was over at Appomattox, Forest, the Klan and their supporters simply hung on like Dodgers’ fans after the 1951 Championship Game between the Evil Brooklyn Dodgers and the New York Giants in 1951.

This being said the idea of beer and donuts going together is not all that strange, after all there are many deserts which combine alcohol and sugar.  It is just the fact that something is right about a hot and fresh Krispy Kreme and a good pilsner or lager.  Tonight’s brew is a Harp’s Lager from Ireland.  Somehow I think that the Irish had to be the originators of the beer and donut combination.  I think the Brits would think the combination insulting, the French uncultured, the Italians unromantic and the Germans simply illegal.  Only the Irish could come up with this succulent combination.

So all that aside we have discovered a wonderful desert combination.  Hot and Fresh Krispy Creme Donuts and a good beer.  Life doesn’t get much better than this.  It is a yin and yang kind of thing.  You get the sugar rush from the donuts but the beer counteracts the rush.  There is patently a chemistry that only the Deity Herself understands in this.  Well tomorrow is Dos De Mayo and I will have to be up early to help Judy get ready.

As far as the Tides, they beat the Scranton-Wilkes Barre Yankees on the road, 14-7 ending a 3 game losing streak.  Tides sluggers Nolan Reimold and Oscar Salazar each hit home runs while starting pitcher Chris Tillman got the win.  Reimold has already taken 8 out of the park this year.  He is really the first serious home run hitter that the Tides have had since we have lived in the area. The Tides will come back home for a 4 game series against the Columbus Clippers on Monday. I think I will get three of these games in before the Tides and I come back into town about the middle of the month.

Peace and blessings,

Steve+

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April 30, 2009 · 21:48

April Baseball in Norfolk…Thank God for Global Warming

April is at long last over.  Though officially spring, the weather in Norfolk or the Hampton Roads area is often miserable.  It can and usually is cold, rainy and windy.  Low temps often are in the 40s and sometimes early in the month in the 30s.  While this is pretty pathetic compared to the Great Plains, Great Lakes and Northeast where winter doesn’t really end until like June, it is still a pain in the ass.  Especially if you are a member of the Church of Baseball, Harbor Park Parish.  Since I am a member of said parish the weather here in April hath great interest for me.  I think it was our first season here, I don’t refer to them as years, they are indeed seasons, that we went to our first home opener at Harbor Park.  To be succinct we were totally unprepared for the climatological experience having just come up from Jacksonville Florida.  In other words on the 3rd of April or whatever it was, we froze our asses off.

I really can’t remember if it was the 2004 or 2005 home opener the weather was quite sporty and very cold.  The temperature at game time was 38 degrees.  There was a wind coming out of Center Field blowing into our face at a steady 25-30 mph with gusts to 45.  You can figure the wind chill yourself, but to say the least it was cold as hell behind the plate at Harbor Park.   Now we came prepared.  We had heavy jackets, long  johns and layered clothing.  Yet we were still cold as hell.  I ended up spending a bunch of money on a Norfolk Tides blanket to go over us, instead of beer we were mainlining coffee and hot cocoa to try to stay warm.  Despite all that we did to keep warm we were driven from the park by the 7th inning stretch.  I’m sure that the ever patient Judy would have wished to depart a fair amount sooner, but there is something almost unholy and heretical to me about leaving a game early.  It’s like doing the “down and out” after Eucharist at church.  Catholics understand this, the people receive communion and continue walking out the door without waiting for the closing prayer and benediction.  However, in this case, in order to keep warm I finally gave in and took Judy home.  Weather of this kind has not been a singular experience in our stay here.  I have spent a fair amount of money on jackets, blankets and sweatshirts at Harbor Park as well as a few other stadiums just to stay warm.  Time and time again in April we have frozen our asses off watching ball games.  I have talked with the Deity Herself about this but She has basically told me to “Suck it up” as it “builds character.”  Since I have been labeled a character by some I guess that Her plan for me is working.

This year has been a mix of weather.  We have had a couple of very nice nights for baseball.  In fact I worn a t-shirt, cargo shorts and Birkenstocks on Tuesday night.  Last night we were back to cold weather with a lot of wind. It was cold enough for me to leave my seat and try to stay warm.  After making a deposit of my rental beer (one can never really buy beer) I went to get a to get a charcoal grilled King-Twist pretzel.  I made sure that I stayed up at the warm fire produced by the charcoal at the pretzel stand as long as I could while eating my cinnamon sugar pretzel.  After finishing this I took my second rented beer, a Gordon Biersch Marzen, and hung out with Chip, the usher for section 202.  Chip is a retired Navy Chief who served in submarines.  Over the past few years we have gotten to know each other.  He’s a great guy. After a nice conversation with Chip I moved down the stairs  to hang out with Elliott, the usher for my section 102 on the walk separating the 100 level from the 200 level. This is Elliott’s first year as an usher and he knows his baseball as does Chip. It is fun just to talk about life, baseball and faith with these guys.

So Elliott and I leaned up against the rail and talked about the game, life and family as I drank my rented beer.  One of the cool things about being a season ticket holder is that the park becomes like a comfortable pub where you relax and enjoy life with people who love the game.  For me this is pretty cool.  No matter how tough a day I might have, the calm brought about by the simple view of the diamond settles and centers me.

While hanging out with Elliott I was able to grab a foul ball which had come straight back and bounced off the press box into my my hands.  This was the second ball in two days that I had picked up.  The first was the night before when I outran a couple of drunks for a foul ball that had come back over the grandstand as I walked to my car.  Having kept that ball I gave it to the only kid left in my section of the stadium.  This was a hearty lad not more than four years old sitting with his equally hearty family.  Mom expressed her gratitude, the lad said thank you and it made me look like a nice guy and I still got to keep a ball.  Actually, the times a Harbor Park I have got a foul ball I have given it to a kid. This is not because I am a nice guy.  The truth is that I am like an evangelist for the Church of Baseball.  I remember what it was like to get my first baseball at Anaheim Stadium when I got one from Angels outfielder Billy Cowan.  I want to ensure that these young people join the one true church and not one of the apostate sects like football or basketball. As I said previous night I had picked up a ball that came over the grandstand while heading to the parking lot.  Since I was the only kid out there I figured that it was mine, the drunks behind me who were stumbling to try to catch me would have to fend for themselves.

As it were the weather stayed cold and windy.  I finally looked at Elliott and said “Thank God for Global Warming or we would really be freezing our asses off.”  Elliott laughed and said that he would have to remember that one and use it.  Chip also agreed. In April and early May I do have to thank the Deity Herself for global warning.  Come July and August I will be arguing with her that She needs to cool things down and She as usual will tell me to stop complaining and enjoy the game at the Harbor Park Parish of the Church of Baseball.

Peace, Steve+

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April 29, 2009 · 22:33

How Pro-Life People Make Themselves Look Like Idiots

Note: This post will likely cause me grief but it has to be said. To preface this I am pro-life and anti-abortion. I fully support my Church’s stand on abortion. At the same time I am becoming more and more appalled by the less than informed, often illogical and many times  uncharitable comments made by those who claim to be pro-life on subjects other than abortion that they no little or nothing about. This post may come across as harsh but I mean it that way with no apology.

Recently I have seen some conversations and blogs by “pro-life” individuals lately that make me shake my head in bewilderment.  I am beginning to wonder if some people in the “pro-life” movement have lost all sense of reality.  I also am beginning to wonder if pro-life people are becoming the greatest threat to the pro-life movement.

What I saw today was a conversation by some in the pro-life movement about government’s efforts to ensure that the Swine Flu does not reach epidemic or pandemic status.  What I saw was to put it mildly, idiotic, unethical and un-Christian.  In fact I would view it as an argument that as a minimum seriously calls into question the judgment of these people.  At worst such actions and statements make me seriously if they are truly “pro-life” at all, and not just simply anti-abortion and the hell with everything else concerning life, especially if it deals with already living and breathing people.

The basic argument of these people, who I assume are well meaning, is that they object and find unreasonable government efforts to respond to the Swine Flu outbreak.  They called this into question because the “government supports abortion which kills millions of pre-born babies every year.”   Another commentator,  who obviously knows nothing about influenza or other infectious diseases, made very uninformed comments about the Spanish Flu of 1918-1919.  This idiot attempted to minimize it talking about the fact that medicine has advanced and there is better sanitation. Others were spouting inane comments like “woord!” I have to assume this is something like the Marine “oorah!”

Unfortunately there is a severe moral and ethical disconnect in the argument.  The problem with this whole line of reasoning says that we will fight like hell for the unborn but the hell with the “Post-born” simply because we are angry at the governments policy against the unborn.  Sorry, if you are truly pro-life they all count the same. Just because the “pro-life” movement has fixated on abortion doesn’t mean that people who are already born don’t count.  In this line of reasoning the unfortunate “Post-born” who have the misfortune of contracting the disease, well, their lives don’t matter.  Screw them because we disagree with government policy on abortion.  The claim by some that the government is  hypocritical because it puts money into trying to stop what history has show to be a really really nasty disease.   Remember H1N1 in 1918-1919 alone killed 50-100 million people worldwide. Admittedly, this was in a time when medical care for such problems was much less capable than current medical technology.  At the same time what took weeks or months to get around the world happens in hours. This  gives governments and other responders no room for error.  Likewise the population of the United States is about double what it was back then and unlike the 1918 we are a more urban and closely packed society. We are utterly dependent on interconnected transportation and logistics networks to maintain the supply of food, medicine and other essentials. These are delivered as they are needed versus stockpiled. A pandemic would seriously disrupt this network and cause chaos.  You think that the economy sucks now, it will be sucking like a Hoover if this happens.

Swine Flu or H1N1 targets young healthy people, the age 20-40 crowd. The writers of these posts will have great fun if this becomes and epidemic or pandemic.  I am sure that most of them are Flu Virgins.  In other words they won’t have the anti-bodies to fight this off if they get it.  This will really suck.  They get to die if this gets really bad, or best they will suffer greatly.  Over half the fatalities in 1918 were in this age group.  Just wait until decisions have to be made about who gets treatment and who dies in a pandemic.  You can bet that most if not all of these people will advocate for themselves and their families at the expense of others that they deem unworthy of life. It’s easy to be pro-life when your life isn’t the one in the balance.

So with this being the case, the logical person has to assume that these folks are not genuinely pro-life, but rather simply anti-abortion.  Unfortunately I am cursed with being a logical, rational and analytical I cannot limit my pro-life beliefs to simply protecting the pre-born.  That is a worthy mission but we also have to stand up for the right to life of the “post-born” too.

Conversations and arguments of the nature presented by the people I read today makes pro-lifers look heartless, cruel and hypercritical.  By making these comments they subvert their own efforts to protect the lives of the unborn.   The idiocy of these people’s conversation was absolutely mind numbing.  I almost wonder if the verse out of Romans can be applied to these folks.  “Claiming to be wise they became fools…”   Of course I applied that verse out of context, but no less so than I have seen others in the “pro-life” movement do.

I’m not going to re-hash last night’s post here, no will I go deeper in the weeds on the subject.  If people are actually interested in the Swine Flu they can read John Barry’s The Great Influenza” Alfred Crosby’s America’s Forgotten Pandemic and Pete Davies’ The Devil’s Flu. Additionally they can go and visit the evil government Centers for Disease Control at  http://www.cdc.gov/swineflu/ or the really super evil UN sponsored World Health Orgnaization at http://www.who.int/csr/don/2009_04_24/en/index.html.  Unfortunately I fear that my words will fall on stoney ground. People who think this way haven’t a logical cell in their brain.

My point is that people who claim to be “pro-life” cannot allow themselves to submerge themselves into stupidity by making comments that are really anti-life. If followed to their logical conclusion the inane ideas spouted by these knuckleheads would allow millions of people to die in the event of a Swine Flu or Avian Flu pandemic.  If an unborn baby’s life is worth going to jail for in a protest, what is the value of the already born?  Oh wait according to the logic applied by the people that I saw today, absolutely nothing.  To protect the unborn they have become “anti-life.” That’s just sad.

This is painful to watch.  What ever happened to any theological, philosophical, ethical or personal reflection on the value of life?  What ever happened to the “pro-life” movement?

Peace,  Steve+

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